"No best friend of mine would ever wear AirPods" I said in response to
"Are we best friends"
because I'm honest only if that means I don't have to be vulnerable but
he takes the white dots out of his ear in a single smooth movement and grins
and I think I like myself again
Someone called me a bad friend
and I spent the next seven years trying to prove them wrong
because my first thought wasn't one of anger but exposure
a frantic panicked how did he find out
and I think it's as hard to be seen as it is to be misunderstood
The worst person I've ever known said talking to me felt like coming home
and it scares me now how happy I once was to hear it
because in knowing him I burned my house to the ground
A greater woman would move on but I watch the film on loop
and I think I might've been someone great if only everything was completely different
A child in an airport gripped my thumb with her entire fist
sobbing loudly while my heart grows three sizes
because she feels like mine so fiercely I'm almost convinced she is
but of course she's not and actually nobody ever will be
and I think the truth in that might just kill me
I'm so whatever the opposite of 'at peace' is it's not even funny
but I know I saved a life once
because she seems happier now even if she hasn't forgive me for it yet
has a food page and everything and I'm jealous and bitter
and I think that's the worst I'll ever feel about the best I'll ever do
- it's not my fault but then again it is
Comments
Post a Comment